It's so funny. I'm sitting here at 4:00AM in the morning, and I am all of a sudden scared that Lia won't find the right guy to marry in the Temple. I brought my computer to work tonight, and I've written her this big letter about the importance and divinity in womanhood, motherhood, and femininity. It's a gift, priviledge, an honor, and a right to hold at great value! I'm telling her to take time to play with her siblings, give one more hug, to look over her shoulder at her dad, ME, when she is getting into that car for the Prom, to smell the roses, to feel the grass under her feet, to let the wind blow her hair over her face and kiss her checks, to not be in such a hurry to grow up! To assure her that we love her so much, and that the love in a family only grows and is never divided among the kids where some have more than others, or a "bigger piece." ... and she isn't even in my arms yet and I am looking forward with a sense of dread to the day that she doesn't fit into my arms anymore. Will she go into the arms of a man that truly deserves her? Who appreciates her? Who loves her more, if not as much as I do? Who would do anything to be worthy of her? To be man enough to impress me to the point where I would encourage her, if not place her in his arms?? It's a wonder that any Parent ever sleeps at night!! I have 1.8 kids, and I am already worried about all of them!!!
I want to be the best Dad. I want my family to be safe. I want so much for them. Do you worry about those things? Maybe it's these feelings that drive us to the things we need to to make all of it possible.
PERVERCIONES #154 [Gold edition]
7 years ago
3 comments:
Trust me, we are all worrying about it. Worry should be in the same definition as parent. And from what I have heard and experienced, it just gets worse. The wonderful thing is that most of the time, you are in for a beautiful surprise when they do what you have taught them, when they smile back, slobbery kisses and na-night hugs. It's worth every moment.
Love you guys-
Becca
Oh Kitch; What a wonderful daddy you are! It's in those tender feelings (that wrench your heart) that you can feel in the smallest measure what our Heavenly Father feels for each of us. Have you ever thought about our Heavenly 'FATHER' as feeling that way about you? He does you know! Your letter to your daughter brought tears to my eyes. I hope you will seal that letter up and deliver it to her on her wedding day or some other special day. It will mean so much to her to know of your feelings even before she was born.
Yup, you will feel all of those things and more as she grows and inches away from your arms and into anothers. It will happen, and it's supposed to happen but it hurts...I know!
Jaxon is your precious son, your firstborn, your heart, your namesake and heir. He will always be your big little boy and you love him more than life. But somehow daddy's little girl, your baby Lia, will seem much more fragile and more tender. A baby girl will bring out those powerful protective feelings you expressed.
With her birth, your little family will have the perfect mix, one boy, one girl, one daddy, one mommy, four 'proud as punch' grandparents and lOTS of aunts, uncles, and in time...lots more cousins. I'm so proud of you Kitch! I'm incredibly proud of Angela and thank God every day that she is part of our family. You are both such devoted parents that I know your children will be confident and successful adults. I love you son!!!!
MOM
I believe all good parents have fears and worries for their children. The only advice I have it to acknowledge those feelings as an unconditional love (not unlike our heavenly fathers love for us) and to just cherish everyday we have with our children while they are just that...children. Hang in there...you're normal. :) Kara
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